NO, I will not Apologize

Life Lessons Learned from my Cat

Ingrained upon women is the character trait of being a care-taker.

We are rewarded as little girls when we take care of our baby dolls. For our birthdays, we are given miniature kitchen sets, little vacuum cleaners, pretend appliances. The message is loud and clear — we are meant to care for others.

While this is not an entirely harmful message, the underlying message is. We are made to understand that we are meant to care for others without regard to ourselves.

We are taught that we need to be a good hostess. We need to ensure that those around us are comfortable. We need to hug and kiss moldy-smelling, old relatives upon command. Oh, and don’t let anyone catch you not smiling. Oh the horror!

Then there is me. I was that ‘difficult’ girl that was not domestically inclined. I hated cleaning up after others. My cooking skills were an embarrassment. Grace and decorum? Well, let’s just say that was not my thing either.

As you can imagine, my childhood was somewhat of a struggle, leaving me wondering why I was flawed? Why could I not be like the other dainty, demure flowers around me? As a person raised in the Midwestern corn belt, in a very rural setting, surrounded by picturesque, pastoral landscapes, I just never fit in.